Thanks to help from Shayla Kersten, I got the first chapter to Fallen redone. Yea! Now I just have to re-read the rest of it, but I love this story so that’s not much of a chore! Hopefully, I’ll be ready to resubmit sometime next week.
So, since I’m in such a good mood, I’m sharing the love–aka trying to list everyone’s spirits with a little humor. 🙂 Below, I pasted an abridged list of “101 Ways to Annoy People.” (To read the FULL list, click here.) Oh, by the way, I left the numbering from the original list; I swear I’m not that numerically challenged, lol.
101 Ways to Annoy People
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write “for sensual massage.”
10. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 98 copies.
13. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.
16. Reply to everything someone says with “that’s what YOU think.”
17. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your “astronaut training.”
18. Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for “violating your airspace”.
19. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a “real hoot.”
20. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with Lysol.
23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
24. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.
26. Finish all your sentences with the words “in accordance with the prophesy.”
29. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.
32. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
36. Ask 1-800 operators for dates.
38. Sew anti-theft detector strips into peoples backpacks.
42. Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon.
48. Tape pieces of “Sweating to the Oldies” over climactic parts of rental movies.
55. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
56. Pay for your dinner with pennies.
58. Repeat everything someone says, as a question.
61. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: “Do you hear that?” “What?” “Never mind, its gone now.”
65. Demand that everyone address you as “Conquistador.”
66. At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.
72. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce “no, wait, I messed it up,” and repeat.
75. Ask people what gender they are.
79. Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers brains, such as “Feliz Navidad”, the Archies “Sugar” or the Mr. Rogers theme song.
80. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head. like a parakeet.
81. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.
84. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
88. Sing along at the opera.
90. At a golf tournament, chant “swing-batabatabata-suhWING-batter!”
93. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about “psychological profiles.”
98. Construct elaborate “crop circles” in your front lawn.
100. Make appointments for the 31st of September.